She had a dream sitting there in the TV room near the snacks. In it, she was getting married. She'd was wearing a cream-colored dress with a full, ballet-length skirt, cream colored flats, and a silk, fitted bodice with long sleeves. Her hair was in an elaborate updo. She turned this way and that, looking at herself over her shoulder in the dream, smiling at her image.
Her two cousins were there, wearing dresses that were best described as "Hooker's Lime Green Dream" with black patent stilettos and her aunt was also there, wearing a witch's pointed hat with a black Chanel-style suit and mid-heel leather pumps.
"Why the hell did it have to be lime?" her less pleasant cousin asked in the dream. "And it's so short and tight you can almost see the outline of each pubic hair."
"I have to agree," said the nice cousin. "It's a bit, well, revealing. You look so pretty and demure and we look like we're going to the reception to earn the rent money."
"And lime," said the unpleasant one.
"I'm digging the lime," said the nice one. "Very different."
"Is there a reason for this hat?" asked the aunt. "You know what people are going to say when they see this hat?"
"You chose the hat," she told her aunt in the dream. "You said, 'Oh, well, look at this cute, different hat.' Then you bought the hat."
"They're going to say I'm a witch!" her aunt said, ignoring what she was saying in the dream.
"Mom" said her daughter. "I was there. You picked the hat. And you said this dress was different and sweet. The skirt's a belt mom. It hardly covers my rump."
"Oh," said the dream aunt. "I thought you meant the dress you'd had one two dresses before this one."
"How would you think that?" asked the nice cousin.
"Honestly," said the aunt. "What difference does it make? They're not going to look at either of you or at the bride. They're all going to be looking at the groom and wondering how the hell she scored someone who looks like him."
"Yeah," said unpleasant cousin. "They are going to be screaming how they're a facially mixed couple."
"Yeah," said the aunt. "How did you convince him to marry you?"
They all looked at her in what she knew was supposed to be her special day. Neither of the cousins had the thighs for this dress. It turned her stomach in the dream.
There was a knock at the dream door and a male voice on the other side asked if he could come in. Before she could reply, her aunt answered for them all.
"Might as well come in. This hat and the bridesmaid dresses have already cursed the occasion," the aunt advised.
Then her aunt spit.
"Spitting on the truth," said her nice cousin. "No one can say we have class."
The door swung open and the handsome man walked in wearing a beautiful tuxedo. As soon as he saw the cousins and the aunt, dream handsome started laughing.
"You three look ridiculous! That's a riot!" howled the handsome man.
After a full minute of laughter where they thought he might fall down and where he actually snorted, he had to add one more thing.
"That lime green is very attractive," he said.
"Thanks," mumbled the cousins.
"And that hat brings out the real you," he told the aunt.
Dream aunt's mouth went into a line.
In the dream she wasn't horrified that he'd somehow found her and was going to marry her. She was relieved and pleased that the man she was going to marry was speaking up for her.
His eyes found her in the dream. He gasped and tears came to his eyes.
"You're beautiful!" he said. "That dress makes you look like a member of a royal family."
"The royal pains in the ass clan," muttered the aunt. The unpleasant cousin snickered.
Handsome whipped his head and glared at the aunt.
"My bride has never been married and from this second onward, you are going to make her smile and be glad that you've been invited," he said sternly. "Or please leave now."
The aunt sputtered. The cousins looked at the floor.
"I think we understand each other now," said Handsome. He swept up to her and pulled her close for a kiss.
"See you in a few, honey," and left the room, closing the door behind him.
The nice cousin snickered.
"I'll have none of that," said the aunt.
"Yeah, you will," she and the nice cousin said together.
"JINX!" they cried out and embraced.
She awakened right then with a start. A team had scored a touchdown and the kicker had gotten the one-point conversion. People were extremely pleased. The smell of the roasting turkey wafted into the room. A lot of snacks had been ingested.
"Hey, Sleeping Beauty," said her nice cousin. "Want to take a walk?"
She stretched her arms out and then up, first to the right, then back up.
"Sure," she said. "I had just had a lovely dream."
"Great," said the cousin. "Lovely dreams are such a relief."
They each got their own coat and put it on. Her cousin's was lime green wool.
"That's a color you don't usually see in a coat," she told her.
"But it suits me, right?" asked the cousin.
"It sure does," she told her.
"I'm digging the lime. It's different," her cousin told her.
She shuddered a little at what her cousin had just said. They walked into the kitchen to say they'd be back pretty quickly, that they were having a walk.
Her aunt was having a cackle over the hat she found in the basement when they were putting away the toys. It was a pointy witch hat.
"Do I need a cauldron?" she asked and cackled some more.
"No!" she exclaimed and she and the nice cousin walked out into the November air.