Sunday, January 31, 2016

Ghost

This morning I happened to hear a story on NPR by a woman in her 30s who had been partaking of the phenomenon that is online dating.  She basically said that it took this long in her life to be honest with someone and say she wasn't interested in them.  Not "I am going to be busy," nor "I am going to California," and especially not the old college combo lie, "I am going to be washing my grandmother's hair."  Cowardly but it might save feelings she thought.  She said she finally mustered the courage to say, "This isn't going to happen," or "Sorry, I am not interested."  She said she got very polite replies like "good luck."  It's also not cowardly.

Apparently, the phenomenon of "ghosting" is a very popular way of dealing with someone you don't want to see again.  Just ignore any and all emails, texts, phone calls you might receive.  Disappear from that person's life.  Like a ghost.

Ladies and gentlemen, I am going to say this one time.  Do not be a coward.  If you've already been a coward, do not be a coward ever again.  I bet if someone did it to you that you wouldn't like it one bit.  You would call that person all kinds of names behind their back.  Doing it to someone else with a mental note that you're done with it is a lousy thing to do.

Men!  Nut up!  Ladies!  Find your inner Hillary Clinton!  Just reply and say, "Sorry, this isn't for me."  You don't have to say how the person is great and it's not them, it's you.  Nope.  Just say that it's not for you.  Better that the person knows earlier rather than later that it isn't going to work out.  Ghosting confirms you're a shit but only eventually.  Not being a coward means it's not going to work out and everyone is free to move on with their lives which is a very good place to go.

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